Marcia's Leadership Q and As: Leader or bully? Some common poor leadership traits

Q. Our company has a diversity of managers, some great mentors and leaders and others who are dysfunctional and toxic. Why the difference, and what can we do?

A. People have beliefs and assumptions about how to manage and lead. Some have learned bad behaviors from previous managers. Others learned good behaviors. Some studied leadership fads and “best practices” that create a toxic work environment. Some are arrogant. Others continually study leadership and seek to improve their leadership. Some ask questions and don’t think they know it all.

There’s positional “leadership.” Some people with titles and positions assume they know how to lead. Few do. Others are great leaders!

What’s the difference? Some leaders create a beautiful, productive culture where people are self-motivated, can contribute ideas and problem solve together, feel valued and appreciated, and achieve great results. This culture has a foundation of trust, respect, and creates joy in work.

Poor positional leaders have these traits. They judge, criticize, and blame people for the system results that they don’t like (and they are accountable for creating the sub-optimal system;) they micromanage (example: they insist on being copied on all emails;) they don’t include people in decisions, but rather dictate and tell; they lead with fear. A bullying, toxic workplace emerges, and it becomes contagious. People stop communicating and collaborating; they withdraw. Eventually they resign.

Sometimes dysfunctional managers don’t realize they are really bullies. They have internal fears, low self-esteem, are inauthentic, and have no self-awareness. Their arrogance (and title) continues to evolve, and the gossip about them increases. But no one wants to work with them.

Leaders have a choice, to become better leaders or to stay stuck as poor managers. Great leaders continually assess themselves and seek outside feedback, focusing and asking, “How can I be a better leader?” Chances are, if you’re not asking that question, your dysfunctional behaviors are pretty robust, and your authentic leadership is low!

Choose your legacy. Will you be a bully, or micromanager, or a great leader?